“I
never knew men hurt this much when they loose a lady,I can see it
through your eyes Wilson.you are broken and you cant think straight,I intuitively understand your soul as it is reflected through your
eyes.You will be over this in few days.Count on me for anything.You
will win this battle and rejoice for finishing the race.Life is
everyday and every experience is a road to enlightenment ”Faith
said
Wilson was relieved by Faith insight that it run through him like a deep
breath.He was glad someone was listening to his lamentation as he was
laden with grief and heartache.
“Sometimes
I wish I can sleep and wake up a new man. having forgotten all my
woes. I wish my head had a format button, it would be so fabulous.I
would be so happy.”
Wilson felt a sense of loss,like someone had died.He also felt lost as if he
had no direction.A heaviness remained in his chest for a long time
and occasionally he felt like something was piercing him where his
heart was supposed to be. Every time he though about Grace he felt
that pain and that was constantly. That lost feeling would overcome
him and he would walk and walk, to no where in particular. He wished
that the ground would open up and swallow him so as to easen his
heartache.he truly and deeply loves Grace. The
thought of loosing her to the other man,whom Wilson referred to as imbecile
and an old cantankerous man,made him more and more vulnerable.
“What
wrong did I do for Grace to leave me,Faith,Just give me an insight.Am
I not a good man.a gentle one to be precise.I treated Grace with
respect,trust and love.I feel abhorrence to realize that she took my
kindness for granted.” Wilson pented out his anger,His devastation
was great as he often felt like he was a part of a wasteland. The
misery overtook him and he found himself being nasty to people.This
is the reason he felt he needed to vent out his bottled emotions to
someone who was willing to hear him and not judge him for being a man
who is not strong.Faith was the only one who could listen to him and
understand him intuitively and advice him accordingly
Wilson
met Grace at a friends family gathering during the Kenyatta day
festive two years ago,and just the first glimpse made him feel this was the woman
for him.Grace had a striking and captivating look ,her lips were like
the color of the morning sun,she glowed as she walked around the
compound,she stood out making almost all men in the compound admire
her.This forced Wilson to go and converse with her as he believed in
the swahili saying,chelewa chelewa utampata mwana si wako.He hoped she
is not only beautiful but intelligent.His expectation were met and
he was overwhelmed by her wit and her positive view on life,a lady
full of hope . She is strong enough to make all her dreams come true.
She knows love, therefore she gives love. She recognizes that her
love has great value and must be reciprocated. If her love is taken
for granted, it soon disappears.She had a dash of inspiration and a
dabble of endurance.
“Anything
I say about your beauty will sound so cliche, so I will honor you
with my silence.” Wilson recalled his first words to Grace, “They
say the eyes are the window to the soul, if that is true then your as
beautiful on the inside as you are on the out."
He
also remembered how he found difficulty in speaking his heart out to
Grace whose Intel had fascinated him in profound ways.
Dating
Grace gave his life meaning. It gave him a purpose and it fueled his
hopes
Now
he is heartbroken,Grace left him for another man.He cant understand
why.He had showered her with love,gifts,time.ears to listen and a
shoulder to lean on.This made him go hysterical.Being a writer,He
wrote her poems and love letter despite this era of
facebook,messanger and whatsapp hence letters have lost their
meaning,yet he managed to email or drop her a letter everyday.Her friends envied her as they deeply wished someone could write them a letter too.Letters are very important as frequently communicate more than conversation can. During a conversation, people often lose their train of thought, getting sidetracked and forgetting the gist of what they wanted to say.Love letters also leave a memory so hard to forget. He took
her out on coffee dates after work frequently,he called her a couple
of times during the day to know how her day was faring on.He carried
her handbag which gave Grace intrinsic joys savoring every moment of
time spent with Wilson gentleness.he did all this yet she repaid her
with heartache.sleepless nights and in poverty.Loneliness and feeling
of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.
Faith
tried to encourage Wilson but he was too fragile to be repaired.He
just wanted Grace to come back and unbreak his heart and tell him she
loves him again.Relationship are like glasses.Sometimes its better to
leave them broken than to try hurt yourself putting them back
together.Love begins with a smile,grows to a kiss and ends with a
teardrop.Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it
does.Love is a battle,love is a war.love is a growing up.
Something
so deep is broken in Wilson's life.He will never love a woman that
deep again.He will just use and dump them since he will never trust
them again.Its such a pity that He will never believe in love again.He
soul is heartless now.He will forever look at women with hate,disgust
yet it was only one lady who broke his heart.A soul gone to the dogs.Hope he find someone to re-energize his love in profound ways
It's
really hard to define heartbreak in one sentence. It's a process and
it happens in waves.Heart break happens when expectations aren't
realized. If Wilson had expected that Grace would have chickened out
then he would probably not have been so hurt, because he expected it.
Some people live to expect the worse to circumvent the pain and
heartbreak that comes with disappointment.
I
know I will sound nuts but when a relationship make one feel they are
like wondering in the desert with no hope of a promised
land they should let it go.let go gives one freedom and freedom is
the only condition for happiness.
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